


His Lover's Souls

by SusanStoHelit



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Cas ships it, Changing POV, Feelings, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining, Pining Everybody but mostly Sam, Requited Unrequited Love, Team Free Love, omnipresent narrator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-18 08:42:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9377162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SusanStoHelit/pseuds/SusanStoHelit
Summary: When Cas and Dean get together, Sam is left alone. But he needs and he wants and he doesn't know how to make it stop. Except for drastic measures of course.





	

"You good?" Dean asked as he poured himself another cup of coffee. The research had been going on for the better part of the evening, although it wasn't as pressing as Dean made it out to be. Cas suspected it might have something to do with the irritating tension he'd noticed the last few months. It had been simmering, ready to boil over any second, ever since, in a somewhat anticlimatic way, Cas had confessed that he was attracted to Dean in a more "postman" and less "brother" way - however strange that sounded to his own ears, considering their current predicament. "Yes, Dean," he said. 

Dean absentmindedly carded his fingers through the scruff at Cas' neck and he felt a lovely shiver run down his back at the casual display of affection.

Almost as if on cue, Cas' eye fell on the prone figure on the couch. Sam's head was bent low, his shoulders sagging and he almost seemed curled in on himself on his side, with the book he was reading propped against something or other on the couch table. Cas frowned.

He needed to pay better attention to the younger Winchester. He loved both of the boys with all he had as an angel and as he understood that most people preferred monogamous relationships he'd never raised the issue with Dean. There was enough sibling rivalry as it was. And he was content. Happy, even. Ah, who was he kidding - being with Dean was exhilarating. The one and only very righteous man with his unending capability for love and forgiveness and sacrifice - the most beautiful shining soul. And he belonged to him. But wasn't that the point somehow?

Sam and Dean were soulmates, the perfect match to each other in every respect and Cas couldn't help but crave the other half of the soul he had fallen in love with. And anyway, they should've been closer than ever but as Cas went on observing, he noticed the careful distance the brothers kept between them, the body language that screamed "stay away" and, curiously, in both cases "I hurt".  
He vowed to make sense of it all. For now, he turned to Dean right in time to receive a soft kiss.

\----/----

Sam turned further in on himself. If he had to witness another PDA with himself as "the public" he was going to lose it. His chest felt like a cavity, holed out, red and raw. It hurt all day every day, the fact that he didn't have a place at his own home anymore.  
Something must've scrambled his brain somewhere along the road. He'd always loved Dean. He'd even always lusted after his big brother - there had been times when he'd honestly contemplated suicide but had opted for Stanford instead. And didn't he regret it every time Dean dragged it up.. anyway. He'd been the closest. No matter how close Cas had become he'd known they shared a heaven and everything would turn out perfectly well. Then he'd started noticing Cas more and the angel's unending patience and loyalty and had felt his heart expand over time. There hadn't been a flash of pink and fireworks in either case, but eventually Sam had to admit to himself, one lonely night in the library, that he was the most screwed up person - thing - to ever grace the earth.  
And what was left to do when you realize you love your brother and your best friend more than you should and more that you'll ever be allowed?  
He'd put his face into his hands and cried. And come morning he'd put a smile on his face and pretended to be fine because no matter how far they'd come in talking things out - he'd never utter a single syllable betraying the depth of his depravity.  
And if that meant hurting each day while witnessing their happiness it was just a way to pay penance. However, he'd not anticipated how much pain he'd be in. He - of all people - had underestimated his soul's capacity to hurt. Fool. They were stronger together than apart, so he stayed.

\----/----

Dean was at the end of his rope. It had been almost a year since he and Cas had finally moved from secred pining to openly celebrating the joys of gay love but something seemed off with the whole business. He should be skipping down the road in nothing but a rainbow flag considering his history and awesome relationship. But who was he kidding- ever since they'd been open about it Sam had turned away from them. Dean had told Cas he didn't care what anyone said or did and he'd meant it but seeing your own brother, your only constant, the man he trusted with everything, his life, his soul, the man he loved with all his heart - seeing him turn away was excrutiating. Not that Sammy was overt about it. It was in the glances he snuck and how quickly he looked away, in the way he shrank back when Dean had wanted to casually touch him in that brotherly-bounds- way they'd established over time, the way he held himself, slightly smaller and curled in on himself when he thought nobody would look.  
As if he was pained over the whole issue and would rather be anywhere than here. It confused Dean and it hurt him more than he cared to admit.

\------/------

Winter was a solemn affair in the bunker. Sam held on to their imbalanced threesome with all his might even though he still felt left out and hollow. He knew they needed him, he needed them, even if he needed more than he was entitled to. His thoughts turned morose more often than not and he started to bury himself even deeper in research and the reassortment of the library. Cas watched him sometimes when he thought Sam wouldn't notice, but a solemn expression on his face, as if he was trying to figure out what was up with the younger hunter. Sam kept his eyes down and therefore startled when suddenly Cas' voice rang through the silence like thunder: "Sam."  
His head shot up, it had been so close. He stared at the angel in question.  
"You are unhappy." The statement was so simple, it broke Sam's heart all over again. "Why?"  
Sams mouth turned down into someting between a smile and frown while his mind ran wild. How was he supposed to sum up the tragedy of his emotional wasteland to one of the people he secretly pined for without giving himself away?  
"I'm fine." He blatantly lied. It was so obviously a lie that Cas' eyes narrowed suspiciously before he shook himself and shot back: "You obviously are not. I see the way you lock yourself in here and don't join us casually anymore. I notice your absence. Dean does, too, you know."  
The almost silent mumble of "oh, do you now." wasn't lost on him.  
"Yes, we do. And Dean is unhappy as well." Sam stewed briefly before he mumbled: "And what about you?"

But Cas was already gone.

\------/------

Christmas had been far from their minds so the invitation to Christmas dinner Jody extended to all three of them came by surprise.  
Sam was glad to take his mind off things even if it meant spending far too much time trying to not be too obvious in his misery. The darker, longer days had done nothing to ease or improve his mood.

He sat on the couch, Cas and Dean puttering around in the kitchen just in his line of sight. He watched them weaving around each other while helping Jody tidy up when he had been ushered out already. Christmas had been their affair, family. This was supposed to be family. He watched Dean smile brillantly when Jody threw a burn his way and Cas chuckling along in his adorable way.  
He felt nauseous. He was unable to stop the feelings, he could not be happy, because all he had ever loved eased further and further away from him with his own inability to be normal and happy for them. It was unhealthy. It was damned and it was damn stupid but he wanted so much, he almost couldn't think straight anymore. And Cas had noticed something was wrong, but he couldn't help it. He was a good actor but not as good as that.  
Sam only noticed the tears when they obscured his vision and he hastily turned away from the happy trio in the kitchen.

He was trying to draw deep breaths and get himself under control when Jody plopped down next to him with two mugs of eggnogg, but the second he looked up, her eyes had a shine to them that was never a good sign. She knew - something.  
"Drink this, then spill." She commanded and drank from her own mug.  
He drew even further into himself.  
"Jody." he sighed somewhat petulantly.

"I'm serious. I don't want any murder cases over Christmas and you looked like you wanted to kill someone or something a second ago."  
Sam shook his head: "Honestly, you don't really want to know."  
Her eyes narrowed, then flew over to Dean and Cas kissing under the mistletoe in the kitchen, oblivious to Sam's misery.  
"Oh." she said quietly. "You jealous?"  
Sam looked at his hands: "Maybe."  
"Because they've got someone and you don't?" She inquired further and Sam looked away. He knew it was reckless but if he couldn't tell the two people he was- had been closest to, he could at least tell someone he trusted.  
He looked her in the eyes and shook his head slowly. "Oh shit." she gasped when all the agony of the last months, the last year spilled out of Sam's eyes unhindered. He looked broken and felt opened beyond repair but he needed someone to understand.  
"Is it Cas?" she whispered, now careful.  
He just kept looking at her, willing her to come to the conclusion without him saying anything.  
Please, he begged silently, don't make me say it. Her mouth hung open while she watched his internal inferno through his eyes.  
"Dean?!" she all but squeaked.  
Sam cursed silently as his eyes began to leak without his consent. He expected her to curse, but all she did was keep looking, the eggnogg between them forgotten.  
"No, oh my God," she whispered and it sounded so heartbroken, that Sam wondered why he'd ever thought this would be a good idea. "It's both of them, isn't it?"  
He cast his eyes down, unable to keep staring at Jody's face any longer.  
Both stayed very still for a long time, a long time, then Sam felt strong hands pick the eggnogg from his hands and Jody's arms go around his shoulders, hugging him so hard, and warm and stoic that all he could do was bury his face in her neck and keep breathing until it felt as if her strong presence was the only thing giving him contours at all.

"I'm so sorry," he could finally mumble. "I - nobody knows. I - I couldn't keep it in anymore. I feel so stupid and impossible. I don't know what to do anymore. Nothing helps."  
Jody pulled him up from her shoulder and cupped his face gently: "You know, I never thought I'd be okay with anything as strange and unusual as this but I see y'all and somehow it makes sense. Have you tried talking to them?"  
Sam shook his head and cuckled self-depreciatingly: "Can you imagine how that would pan out? No? I can. I guess I'd be happy to keep my freaky head."  
Jody looked at him sternly: "You give them too little credit."  
He shrugged.  
"Hey, I am kinda okay even though I can't say It's easy on my moral compass. Does that count for anything?"

Sam nodded softly: "Yeah, loads. I expected to fall out of favour with the mention of my - whatever it is. Too bad I'm not in love with you."

She smiled a little sadly and nodded once before her face morphed into a broad grin: "I could take your mind off things."  
He looked shocked for a second before she roared with laughter: "Aww, Sammy, not that way! Come on, I'll show you something." She pulled him up and in another hug before she ushered him into the basement to show him a box of books she'd confiscated lately. She wasn't sure if it would be any good but both of them could sure use the distraction from the unbelievable mess Sammy had just confided in her. Leave it to Sam to make the worst of everything, she thought drily.

Dean watched them go and then turned to Cas. "Something is very wrong."  
Cas nodded solemnly. "I agree." Then he stepped closer to Dean: "Dean, I have an idea what this might be about."  
The other man looked at him sternly, as if the mere idea that someone not him might know more about Sammy was ridiculous.

"I'm serious, Dean. Sam hurts. His soul hurts and it longs for you."  
Dean's head whipped around to the angel.  
"What the fuck are you talking about?" His voice was hard.  
Cas sighed: "I was afraid you'd react this way when told. It's what I sense and see in his eyes." He stepped away but not far.  
Dean's eyes narrowed.  
"Dean, he hurts all the time. Just like you." The other man's expression wavered between anger and panic before settling on fear. "How do you know," he growled, more aggressively  than he'd wanted but Cas just sighed and saw through the antics.  
"I know you both very well. I touched both of your souls multiple times. I died for you. For you both."  
The emphasis on both pulled Dean's eyes up to lock with Cas's. "What are you saying?" He whispered, careful, anxious to hear, thrumming with the tension and confusion of it all.  
"Dean, your soul was the first I touched and you'll always be special to me but could you be more dense? You two shared a heaven. You saved each other countless times to everybody's and your highest costs, you gave your life for each other and the moment one of you is claimed by me the other deteriorates in front of our very eyes. What do you think I imply?!"  
Dean swallowed thickly while a small tremor started to rise in his hand and Cas noticed several small aborted movements as if Dean could not decide if he wanted to curl in on himself, around Cas, run after Sam or run for the hills. Cas had never seen his eyes become so deep, so darkly sickly green that he wanted to escape the whirlwind of suppressed feelings and longing and just tumble inside them to lose himself at once.  
"I don't want to lose you." Dean whispered hoarsely.  
Cas chuckled.

\------/-----

They drove home in silence. Sam rode shotgun, looking morose but a little better with two tomes cradled in his hands on his lap. Dean snuck a glance at his brother to find any clue to support Cas' claim. He watched the way Sam held himself, as if he contained nervous energy that sucked all posture out of his magnificent hunter's body.  
He leant back, his head a heavy weight against the headrest and his eyes closed heavily to shut out each and every speck of light, the long lashes forming beautiful feathery crescents on his hollowed cheeks. Dean felt the guilt gnaw at his stomach. He hadn't taken care of Sam like was supposed to for too long.  
Dean's eyes flicked over to Cas's in the back. The angel smiled wistfully when their eyes met and he raised both eyebrows at Sam, then at the road.  
Dean hastily turned to the road, but his mind was reeling.

\-----/-----

Sam had been better for a few days, less pining, less pain, less panic and more sleep and research. However, Jody's blessed energy seemed to eek out of him slowly as the days wore on and he found himself wondering if it wouldn't be better if he just went and got himself another flat.  
He chuckled darkly as the implications hit him: he'd leave the lovebirds their nest, but he'd be  homeless for good. And it was all his own fault. He set the water to boil for his tea and watched the little bubbles appear and burst on the surface. Bubble bubble toil and trouble -

If there was anything he could do to change his feelings, he'd - damn. Why hadn't he thought of this earlier?  
He'd done so much research and catalogueing lately but even though he was referred to as the bookworm and brains of the trio, he hadn't spared a thought for all the spells and rituals people had made up over centuries to influence love. Of course he wouldn't let himself dream of anything like jinxing others, if anything he'd hex himself to sanity. A small sacrifice to make for everybody's wellbeing. And then they'd fit again, like clockwork. And if he screwed up - he hung his head. He just needed to do something, anything. There was no way he would survive much longer without going mad. He dropped some herbs into the pot and watched them dance in the heat. Yes, some spell...

\-----/-----

Cas's head rested on Dean's chest while the human absentmindedly stroked his head and neck. Both were deep in thought although it was already after midnight.  
"I can feel you thinking, Dean." Cas raised his head. Dean stopped stroking but didn't acknowledge that he'd been addressed otherwise. His stare was vacant but strangely worried at the same time. "Is is about last week? Our conversation again?' Dean flinched almost imperceptibly and wet his lips before looking away and nodding softly.  
"What is stopping you?" the angel pressed.  
Dean frowned: "Why do you think it's my responsibility to start anything, I mean, I - what if we read him wrong and he's not sure, what if he just wants either one of us and not both, what if -"  
Cas sat up abruptly and cupped Dean's face in his hands.  
"Stop it. Right now. You're not making sense. He loves you, I know how he looks at you and honestly, I love him enough to make sure he's healthy and happy and that will not happen as long as he's denied his rightful place by your side, Dean. Sam is made to be yours. And you are made to be his. It's in your make up. If that means I have to share you and not have Sam, I'll gladly do it. You know him, he'd never drive a wedge between us, it's why he's doing poorly after all. I'm not bound to monogamous ideals or anything like that. And you? you were made this way. How could I oppose this kind of rare energy? How could you?!" He knew was forcefully insistent but he needed to make sure Dean got him this time. He was sure Sam hurt and had been hurting for naught for far too long. Why couldn't they see!? However, it wasn't his place to change this, angel he might be but his role in all this had to be established secondary to their bond if he wanted it to work at all. He knew them too well, there couldn't be an iota of doubt if they were to do this right.  
He stared into Dean's eyes, these glassy, gorgeous green eyes, filled with longing so old, it must have existed since before he'd been born. "Oh Dean," he sighed: "You're both such idiots."  
"I'm frightened, Cas," Dean's voice trembled slightly and Cas leant in for a soothing kiss.  
"I know, love. It's going to be alright. Sleep now, I'll watch over you both and we'll do something about it when you're ready."

\-------/------

When they got up the next morning, Dean couldn't find his brother at first; it wasn't like Sammy to oversleep, his running gear was still in its place, unused.  
A stone of worry dropped into the bottom of his stomach and got heavier the more rooms he saw that didn't have his brother inside. He'd never forgive himself if Sam had done something really stupid just because he couldn't get himself to make that leap of faith. Faith, huh, he thought to himself somewhat morosely.  
He heard Cas's steps pass him on the way to the library and turned to follow immediately.  
The picture they found when they opened the door made his insides go from lead to cold in an instant.  
The big desk was strewn with books, Sam's upper body and head lay sprawled out on top of the pile, his long hair fanning out over some of the tomes and some herbs that looked suspiciously like evergreens, herbs used in witchcraft to ensure durability. What made his heart stop was the narrow track of red liquid dropping steadilyfrom the table, in small ironic taptaptap sounds.  
He broke out of his stupor and rushed over to his brother, not sparing the liquid or books another glance.  
"Sammy. Sam, nononono." he gibbered, first carefully touching Sam's head and shoulders before putting his whole weight into it and hauling him up into a sitting position.  
Before Sam could process what had happened he had been manhandled off the desk and jerked awake painfully with a crick in his neck, his face sticky with ritual paint and the panicked face of his crouching brother in front of his bleary eyes. Obviously he'd overdone the nocturnal secret research a wee bit.  
He felt a light slap to his face and only now his hearing deigned to join in. "Sammy, you okay? What did you do?" His brother's voice shook and Sam felt so happy for the attention and guilty at the same time - he wanted to disappear. Dean stared into his eyes, trying to read his sleep addled brain.  
"He researched a spell," Cas said darkly from the other side of the desk. Dean's head shot around.  
"What kind of spell? Sam - what kind of spell?" Sam felt his brother shaking him by the shoulders but the questions had a hard time getting through a week of sleep deprivation and weeks of heavy depression and thoughts of why can't I just not feel, why am I such an abomination why am I not even worth your attention anymore, what have I done now, why can't I just be normal, please Dean, just love me again - Sam felt himself breaking with a crack. His face crumpled with the pain of months and longing of years and too much shame for a lifetime.  
"I'm sorry." he whispered wetly, trying to pull into himself, but Dean's hands flew to his face and kept him upright.  
"These deal with emotions, Dean." Cas added after a cursory glance at the books.  
"What did you do." Dean asked again, barely holding back the panic that threatened to rise again cradling Sam's head in his hands.  
"I just wanted everybody to be happy." Sam gurgled, tears now streaming down his face. "I'm sorry I'm such a fuck up." He closed his eyes, waiting for the inevitable fall out.

Dean's heart broke, seeing his strong, smart, beautiful baby brother like this, half of his face smeared in what now appeared to be red ritual paint, eerily reminiscent of blood, with dark circles under his eyes and tear tracks smearing across his stubbly cheeks. He was such a mess. He soothingly stroked his thumbs over Sam's cheeks, worsening the bloody tableau.  
Cas stepped up to Dean's side and asked carefully neutral: "Sam, who did you want to work magic on?"  
Dean froze. Sam's face contorted in another wave of pain. "Me." he ground out.  
"Why?" Dean breathed, uncomprehending.  
Sam's shoulders sagged in defeat. He might as well tell them everything now, what difference did it make anyway?  
"I couldn't - I can't take it anymore. It's been worse than hell lately, I just wanted - equilibrium." It sounded as stupid as it had been. As if soulless him hadn't been enough for all eternity.  
"What don't you want to feel anymore?" Cas urged him on gently.  
Sam stayed silent while Cas and Dean held their breaths and finally he burst and the words tumbled out of him, slightly slurred: "M 'n love with - with both of you. I'm sorry, so sorry, I swear I don't mean to." His hands flew up to Dean's arms, grabbing him so hard it hurt, afraid, but Dean didn't let go, this was it, the moment he had waited for his whole life.  
"I don't mean to, but Dean you must've known, loved you my whole life, more 'n anything and it's always been fine but then Cas and I was so confused how I can love two poeple when you're both right here and then you two and suddenly I wasn't part of it all 'nmore and I can't stop, Dean. I can't stop, I want to but I can't. Please make it stop." Sam didn't dare open his eyes, he lost himself in the flood of tired, sad, hopeless tears until the world screetched to a halt.  
"Gods, we're idiots." Dean rasped close to him and Sam felt his brother's breath whisper warmly across this face and lips.  
"I love you, too." he whispered and Sam felt hot thumbs gently swipe his cheeks, his tears and the sticky colour painting an all new pattern on his cheek. "Always have, Sammy. Always will."

  
His eyes flew open and locked on Dean's soft, warm, loving gaze. They just looked at each other for a long moment and Cas knew he witnessed the universe righting itself.  
Then Dean leant forward and pressed a soft kiss on his brother's lips that were pliant, wet and open beneath his. Sam made a small, tortured sound and hesitantly, carefully, hopefully answered the kiss in kind. His hands on Dean's arms finally relaxed and slid down to Dean's hands that still cradled Sam's face, but tangled with his big hands now, reforging a connection that had always been meant to be this way.  
It was a thing of beauty and it took Cas's breath away. Yet, he waited.  
When they finally parted, their hands stayed intertwined and Dean's freckles stood out starkly against his blush.  
Then Sam cleared his throat softly and both smiled serenely at each other. "Good?" Dean asked, still all smiles.  
"Yeah." Sam ground out lowly, still sniffling.   
The his eyes flew over to Cas who felt pinned to the spot. He knew this was his privilege, having these souls, these magnificent hunters as his own. He'd done well. If he played it right -  
Sam looked abashedly down at his and Dean's hands. Dean followed his eyes but then looked up at Cas again, beckoning him closer with a gaze.  
"Me, too, you know." Cas said, as casually as he could muster and stepped closer still, right into Sam's other side, his heart hammering a harsh staccato.  
Sam looked up, his brain felt at the same time fried beyond recognition and sharper than ever, memorizing the moment in devastating clarity.  
Dean crouching in front of him, holding his hands tightly but gently, looking at Cas with an easy smile and Cas next to both of them, looking down at him with big blue eyes filled with love and determination.  
With hightened senses he heard Deans regular tense breathing, felt Cas's closeness, heard the rustle of Cas's own plaid shirt, and then his big, warm hand on his neck, carding into his hair, peaceful and slow, soothing the wounds of months and filling him up with hope. Cas luxuriated in the feel of soft hair between his fingers, Sam's bodyheat, everything he had longed for the last months and even years.  
He stooped low and looked at Sam in question before the hunter nodded once and now he cupped Sam's face in his hands, pressing a soft kiss to his hairline, his still wet cheek and finally his mouth. Sam sighed and leaned into it, the fingers of one hand tangling in the front of Cas's shirt to keep him there.  
When they separated, Sam watched dazedly as Cas turned to Dean and kissed him as softly but instead of being painful it made him feel strangely complete.

The angel pulled both hunters into a warm embrace, resting all of their foreheads together.  
"That was a close call. We won't do that again."  
Sam felt Dean's grip on his hands tighten and another kiss to his mouth. For an instant they just breathed.

  
Eventually, Sam felt all energy and adrenaline eek out of him. He was cold, all the insomnia and late night research, adrenaline and stress crashing down and he started to shiver. It went through little tremors to full body shake in mere seconds and he didn't have longer than one second and some silent communication until Cas's fingers touched his forehead and everything went black.

\---/----

When Sam came to, he felt warm and sleep soft. The first thing he noticed was the dusk that had settled outside, the blueish tint of the evening cast the whole room in comfortable twilight. His eyes still felt sore from lack of sleep and all the crying but he felt well rested. Next he noticed the comfortable smell that surrounded him and the change in furniture in the room - until he recognized the bigger bed, the memory foam mattress, the fluffy cushion next to the one he was laying on, and eventually it was the scent that tickled him fully awake. He buried his face in the cushion and inhaled deeply. He was in their bed. The morning's events came back to Sam and he froze with the recollection and the fleeting doubt if it had all been real or just another hallucination, but then he remembered his body shutting down and Cas's fingers at his head.  
He sighed deeply and finally turned on his back. There was a bottle of water on the nightstand and he took a deep drink before dressing himself and wandering out into the living room. It was strange to walk along this way, a path he hadn't used before.

He wondered how they would fit together. Then he heard voices: "Why didn't you say anything earlier?" it was Dean, his voice was soft and low.  
"I know that human custom dictates monogamy, Dean. And when you chose me, I chose you. But it was always clear to me that your own bond with Sam was crucial, that I was lucky to be with you and I wasn't prepared to jeopardize us and it because you weren't ready to acknowledge the possibilities."  
Dean hummed pensievely. "So, you actually fell for my baby brother a long time ago, huh?"  
"Yes, Dean. A long time ago." There was some rustling of clothes that indicated movement.  
"How couldn't I? Your souls match perfectly, you're both so strong and beautiful, I witnessed your strength and resilience many times in the past years. Even as a human I loved both of you for being who you are. I had a hard time suspecting that you'd probably deny loving him as more than a brother until your dying breath."  
Sam heard Dean chuckle: "So glad that I can still surprise you, baby."  
Cas snorted. "Not in regard to stupid nicknames. I ask you to refrain from using this one."  
When silence reigned, Sam dared to step into the kitchen, too. Both occupants of the room had already turned towards him and Cas smiled.  
"Hey sleeping beauty?" Dean joked, giving him a big grin that was slightly insecure around the edges. Sam nodded, then Dean opened his arms and Sam couldn't hold back the huge smile as he molded himself to his brothers side. They shared a chaste kiss, everything still new and tender between them and then Cas stepped into their space, leaning up to kiss him, too, while Dean watched, smiling.

\-------  
Almost one year later  
\-------

Jody still thought of last year's Christmas party with a lingering unease. Sam had been on the verge of disaster and knowing the boys, she had been immensely worried what said "disaster" would entail. Sam had looked bad, haggard, sleepless and sunken in, almost as bad as during the trials. And then, not so very much later, they'd met up and he'd looked well rested and stable. He'd been alone then and they hadn't had a chance to talk about the tender topic and to be entirely honest to herself, she'd wanted to avoid it, too. She wasn't old fashioned and she'd meant what she'd said last year but it still embarrassed her to think about the incestuous interspecies romance Sam had cried over.

Now though, as she watched Cas talk with Sam in the kitchen, moving flaw- and seamlessly in the other's personal space while they cleaned up, nonverbal communication taking place ever so often and Dean sitting at the big table with Claire, practically glowing, she wondered;  
She wondered, if man wasn't ruling about things he couldn't understand when deeming one love better than another, if love wasn't, in fact, bigger than anything.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this far! So this was my first everything: First un-beta-ed, first threesome, first for this fandom, first on this site, first in English, I'm a little giddy right now. I revised it several times of course and I usually pride myself in being reasonably fluent in my chosen second language but please help and point out mistakes if there are any that irritated you while reading. Thanks so much. I hope you enjoyed it. ❤


End file.
